It was the summer of 1994 when I received a message that I needed to dash to Delhi to meet my mother who had unexpectedly fallen perilously sick. It came as a bombshell as I had met her just a few days prior to that. My mother was my best friend, my guide, and my inspiration.
I sprinted off with my 8-month-old baby in tow. I could not fathom life without her. She was the core of my being. How could a gentle soul like her fell prey to illness!
My first ever trip to an intensive care unit of a hospital had me in shock, denial, rage, perplexity and aggravation. We were told that the subsequent 24 hours after her surgery were critical and that my mom would gain consciousness gradually after that. In anticipation we prayed. 24 became 48, 48 became 72 hours and so on. Everybody's levels of anxieties kept intensifying, as she was not gaining awareness. Throughout those days of waiting I went to many places of worship and prayed to God to grant life to my mother.
My prayers were answered. God gave her life, but not responsiveness and movement. She lived like a vegetable for the following six and a half years.
I believe Mummy's sickness came upon all of us for some reason -for my father to value her, to us children to get us closer to one another.
It was in those six years that I went deeper in my yearning to know more about life, souls, karma, etc. Early enough in life I started to tilt towards the spiritual path.
Like it had been designed for me on another plane, some Reiki teachers were coming to my city and I signed up for the seminar without knowing much about Reiki. During the course of the 2-day seminar, with Amita Singh, I learnt self-healing and continued to practice Reiki for myself off and on.
It was almost 6 years by 2000, now that we were seeing my mother in a vegetable state. Each of us was getting sapped emotionally. It was at that time that I started praying for her salvation. My prayers were miraculously answered again. Mummy was finally freed from her physical body. Despite having prayed for the same, the pain of her loss was immense. I wanted to connect with her, communicate with her. The yearning inside was mounting.
Five years after having lost Mummy physically, I came to know of Ranjani Mitra, with whom I could learn my second level of learning Reiki.
The days and months to follow altered my being, my emotions, and me and brought within me a sense of balance, harmony and understanding of many questions I previously had. Over a period of 18 glorious months I learned the 2nd and 3rd degrees in Reiki. It was a beautiful journey that my Reiki teacher embarked me on. I went through several in-explicable experiences and today I live in abundance.
In 2006, I connected with Tejinder Singh, with whom I kept in constant touch till 2009, when he finally handed the teaching Masters degree to me, one of his three out of 600 students.
With my Reiki degrees and practice it does not mean that I am free from any disease or turmoil's in life. It has only made me strong to handle any situation with ease and calm. I now live in acceptance. I accept that whatever is happening to me today or will happen tomorrow has been drafted for my own learning. I now live in the divine moment- in the Now.
I have learnt that I'm responsible for what I am today. I have destined my own path. I have learnt that I am a soul living a human experience, which has been drafted by me at another plane for the alleviation of my own soul. My human experiences today are a result of my previous lives, going through experiences so that my soul can evolve. Our spirits heal our bodies as we go through pains, which have aroused out of fear, resentments, unfulfilled creativities and desires, disillusionments, etc. It is my Karma that got me in this human form, but I am no longer bound by it, my Karma is released by using my divinity and the awakening within me formulates the pattern for the growth of my spirit. My spirit does not know the outcome of my journey here, on earth. God does not know what is going to happen. God does not have an agenda for me. My journey is about experience, which changes and affects my creation. My expanded consciousness brings about an awakening in me. It helps me release negativity and heal my past, allowing the integration of my divine and my human self. It thus makes me accept darkness with joy and in living in the Present Moment with this new understanding.
I believe that there is no time or space in my divine plan. These conditions were only created when we came to earth.
I have learnt to believe that every cell in my body is a soul in itself and that I have a belief system in my energy that I send. I now communicate with my soul, which has immense power.
I believe that all physical problems manifest in the soul level and its treatment is with one self. Healing of any kind is needed not just for the body, but for the mind and the soul, too. Pains arise when there's an obstruction in the flow of energy in a human body. As negative emotions accumulate in a certain part of the body, a person experiences physical pain. Reiki helps in balancing the energies through the chakras and other body parts. Energy follows thought and that is how Reiki energy heals.
I have learnt that I should not judge people. I have stopped trying to change the world because each human is going through his or her own learning experience.
It's my prayer everyday, in which I believe, with conviction:
I am that I am.
I am all that I am.
I am all that I am and all this IS
I am ONE.
I am God also.
I am the Ocean and a drop in the Ocean.
With this prayer and my perception, I live in the Now, in abundance, in acceptance and with bountiful energy, loving myself.
I am grateful to myself, my parents, Reiki energy, my Reiki teachers, Dr Usui and my God, eternally.
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